Quit Stopping Your Growth

Doug Grady

On July 16, 2015, my friend, Doug Grady which is the president of High Achievers published a blog that has a powerfully true message.

It’s been a few days since I have shaved. Many would say I’m growing a beard. But truth is, I’m not doing anything. The beard is growing itself. I actually have to do something to prevent it from growing. Similarly, in life, we do things to keep ourselves from growing personally, professionally, mentally and spiritually.


5 Growth Stopping Actions: S-H-A-V-E

S– surround yourself with people who make you feel better about playing small and not growing. Who are the five people you spend the most time with? Do they challenge and inspire you? Do they support your growth or help keep you stuck?

H– hold on to the past. You dwell on past mistakes, regrets, failures and tragedies. You tell yourself I’ve always been this way, it will always be this way, there’s no sense in even trying. Is it Time to Let Go?

“The past does not equal the future unless you live there.” –Tony Robbins

A anesthetize. This literally means to deprive of feeling or awareness. You engage in activities to avoid the pain of growth. Drugs, alcohol and other forms of self-medication fall into this category. On about day 4 or 5 my beard starts to itch. It can be extremely irritating. If I can’t make it through this uncomfortable period the beard will never reach maturity. What are you doing to remain comfortable?

V– vilify people and circumstances. You look outside yourself and blame others or “life” for where you are, who you are, and your experience of the world.

E escape. Social media, thrill seeking, television, trivial pursuits and other endless distractions will inevitably delay or deny your growth.


Take inventory. Which of the above is your “go-to”? Are there others? A big part of your growth is being brutally honest with yourself about what you do to stop it. 

Are you uncomfortable as you read this? That means it’s working. You now have a choice. Engage in one of your favorite growth stopping activities or face the strange and get to growing. Choose powerfully.

I would like to talk about the S of Doug's SHAVE acronym. In order to grow, surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you. If the people closely associated with you always want to have a pity party and serve pout soup, choose some other friends.  

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       James Barber

       Author of The Networking Guru